“In life, there are times when you’re gonna be as skinny as a celery stick and times when you’re gonna be as fat as a sack of mashed potatoes🤦🏾♀️. Get used to both cause starting over is the name of the game. “
The other day, I caught myself being pissed at myself (breaking news😂). It seems every year I find myself trying to lose 5-10 Pds either because I am skinny and ungrateful (never skinny enough which can be a disease in itself😩) or fat and delusional (surprisingly when I am really fat that’s when I think I have the least amount of weight to lose🙄). Sometimes I feel like I spend my time fighting petty diet stuff in my head all day long.
Hence, this excerpt of a convo I’ve had with myself so many times it’s not even funny anymore:
Husband makes homemade hamburger buns and instead of saying “Thank you” and enjoying said burgers here I am once again going around in circle in my mind:
Lower self: “I am going to eat two burgers. I am starving!”
Higher self: “Eat two but take one as an open bun. Less carb...”
Lower self: “You don’t have to do that, it’s homemade. Take two full buns.”
Higher Self: “You’ve been gorging on carbs for two days now on the account of it being homemade.”
Lower Self: “Life is short, Covid have thought us that much so take two buns and add some chips while you’re at it.”
Higher Self: “Ok, so now we’re adding chips too?“
Lower Self: “They’re air -fried sweet potato and yucca chips, you fool! Doesn’t get better than that.”
Higher Self: “Fine! Eat them you weak thing! Just don’t come crying to me when Summer hits and you’re looking 3 months pregnant.”
Lower Self: “Shut up you pessimistic bully! She can always google how to dress a pregnant belly when not pregnant.”
ME: 😲😲😲😲😲🤕
And just in case you’re wondering how that ended, just know I ate the two full bun burgers plus the chips and some desert. To tell you the truth I felt like I deserved it after that intense session of self-flagellation.
Now, what’s the point of this story you may ask: Well, there are two points to this story:
- First one is to make myself feel better for using “homemade” as an excuse to overeat.
- Second one is to tell you, in case you’ve been lately incline to do so yourself , that it’s a long road and there’s not point beating yourself to a pulp with the celery stick. The goal is to be happy and fit not a miserable dry pepperoni. Nobody has ever accomplished anything by beating themselves up. It’s a work in progress( I should probably record that last bit and keep it close by for when I am having a bad day🙋🏾♀️)
Plus, like I tell myself all the time: At the very least, it’s homemade!
Naturally I would be a hypocrite if I did not mentioned the extra pounds are gonna be “home-gained” as well…at the very least😉😋